My Assessment Copy

What do you currently know about your own assertiveness?

Read the following questions carefully before responding. Then read on for the results and some specific steps to take. 

These questions will be helpful in assessing your assertiveness.  It is important to be completely honest in your answers..  Draw a circle around the number on the answer sheet that describes you most accurately… 

Describe your level of assertiveness in the following scale:  

  1. No or never
  2. Occasionally
  3. More often than not
  4. Mostly
  5. Practically always

Write your answers down in your note book. The question number and then next it your score. You will come back to this after you have finished and add up some numbers.

What does it mean?

You may have found that some of the above items don’t apply to your life. Nevertheless, if you took the time to answer the questions honestly, the questionnaire could be some help in assessing your assertiveness.

Before you start the analysis, write the numbers 1 to 34 across a page in your note book.


Look at your responses to questions (write your score under each number in red)1, 4, 6, 7, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 19, 22, 24, 25, 27, 28, 30 & 35.

These questions are concerned with submissive behaviour.  Do your answers to many of these questions tell you that you are rarely speaking up for yourself? Are there specific situations that you don’t handle well?


Look at your responses to questions (write your score under each number in blue)

2, 3, 5, 8, 9, 11, 13, 15, 17, 20, 21, 23, 26, 29, 31, 32, 33 & 34.

These questions are concerned with aggressive behaviour.   Do your answers to many of these questions suggest you are being more aggressive than you thought you were?


You can see how often you chose assertive behaviour when you:

  • Answered 4 or 5 to Step 1 questions 
  • Answered 1 or 2 to Step 2 questions  

In short, you are assertive if you ‘usually’ take the action described in Step 1 questions and to ‘rarely’ do things described in Step 2 questions.

What becomes apparent is that behaviour is situational. No one is submissive ALL the time, aggressive ALL the time, or assertive ALL the time!  Each person behaves in each of the three ways depending on the situation. It is possible that you have a tendency to lean more often to one style of behaviour. This is only a problem if you are not able to behave in another style should you prefer to. The goal is to choose the most positive behaviour in any given situation.


Re-read each question and think of the reason why you answered it the way you did.  Examine which situations gave you most trouble. Which were easy for you to handle?

You are assertive when you:
  • Control the way you feel
  • Handle difficult situations effectively
  • Have a healthy sense of self-worth
  • Respect other people
  • Recognize your own rights as well as other people’s 
Assertiveness Is not;
  • A guaranteed way to win every argument
  • A guaranteed way to get what you want
  • A way to get others to feel like you feel or think like you think
  • Telling everyone everything all the time