Fear of failure Copy

The fear of failing can be crippling and prevent us from even trying to do something.

Where does this come from? Generally either a hit to our self-confidence, or past failures.

We have been taught that failure is a bad thing. A negative and something to be both feared and avoided. Perhaps that’s why we are just so afraid of failing. It makes us look, weak, unsuccessful, incompetent, not good enough. These in turn often make us feel inadequate and inferior which can lead to a low self-worth.

So let’s change our view and definition of the word “failure”

This comes from my key note speech “The good things about Struggles”

I love the statement: Failure (or as we now call it – a life’s lesson) is an event, not a person. This doesn’t define you! It is simply a very small point in time with a single experience.

The next thing to do to re-define failure is to understand the numbers.

97% of what we worry and fear about NEVER actually happens – This has been scientifically proven.

This can be directly related to our DISC fears. Being taken advantage of, social rejection, instability and criticism. Worry and fear can be mentally and emotionally very zapping which has a flow on effect to everything else we do. Instead of putting ourself through all the fear and worry, why not just get on with things and learn to deal with the 3% that does happen. Read more here Huffington Post article

Prove this for yourself. Jot down the last 7-8 things that caused you worry or fear. Now ask yourself:

  • What was the outcome for them.?
  • Did they cause you life changing grief?
  • Did you learn anything from them?
  • Will this experience help you in the future.
  • Did I really need to worry, fear and attach negative energy to it?

A piece of advice I received in my youth has resonated through my Lifes journey and I’ll share it with you.

“if it won’t matter a year from now, is it worth investing too much negative energy in it today?”

There is something potentially worse!

Worry and fear can lead to frustration, which is often the beginning of anger. Which is poison.

In the 1980’s scientists conducted an interesting experiment and study. They strapped a man to a chair, then proceeded to rile and provoke him. At the point of extreme anger, (you know the cartoons with a red face and steam shooting from the ears) they withdrew his blood and injected it into a healthy rat. Within 60 seconds the rat was dead. Amazing. What does it do to you? Well it can’t be good. If you are a person that is quick to anger, and you’re not alone, so don’t feel crippled by it, but do something about it. There are many ways to overcome this and you can have a much more enjoyable and controlled life. Google has heaps of info.